Your Favorite 2023 Orlando City Players as Craft Beers

Note: We at The Mane Land believe in the responsible consumption of alcohol. If, as an adult of legal drinking age, you decide to drink alcohol, we urge you to please ensure you do so in a safe manner, and never drink and drive.

This article is strictly for the purpose of having fun. If you would like to take it too seriously, you are kindly invited to go read one of the many other serious articles available on The Mane Land. Thanks.

It’s that time of the year, Mane Landers! Each season I look at the roster and pair players (or at least those I haven’t included before) with a craft beer. I base the pairings on what is funny, punny, or whatever else I like. I make no promises that you will be able to find these beers locally, though I make an effort to do so. I also encourage you to share your thoughts whether you agree, disagree, or have your own suggestions for beers or players not mentioned.

Last year, I paired Ercan Kara, Facundo Torres, Silvester van der Water and Benji Michel with an appropriate selection of craft beers. If you want to know which beers I chose for those players please go check it out. Here are this year’s pairings.

Dagur Dan Thorhallsson — Arctic Pale Ale, Einstök Ölgerð

Orlando City’s new Icelandic midfielder is the latest Viking to wear the purple, and he has already shown his mettle in the preseason matches with a goal and an assist. That’s the type of performance that demands a celebratory ale sloshing from an AleHorn, and what better ale to put in said AleHorn than one of Einstök’s finest. Skál!

According to the brewery:

“Three varieties of select hops come together in our Arctic Pale Ale. Whole flower Cascade hops give it American character with classic piney and citrus notes, while Hallertau Tradition and Bavarian Northern Brewer Hops temper the bitterness with a hint of floral and caramel sweetness. The result is an ale that boasts a beautiful clear amber color that is full-bodied yet smooth, rich, and uniquely Icelandic.

Vikings, we invite you to raise your glass with your favorite loyal legions. Whether you just finished exploring the great outdoors, or conquered your workday, you deserve to reward yourself with our fine Arctic Pale Ale.”

Wilder Cartagena — Pilsen Callao, Backus

Much like Cartagena himself, this German Pilsner is actually from Peru. Described by Total Wine as follows: “This German-style Pilsner is crisp and refreshing. Pours bubbly, and has a golden-yellow look. Smells fresh and light with a hint of lemon.” Cartagena was a refreshing back up to Cesar Araujo last season, and I expect even more from him this year. One of his teammates will have to let us know if he also “smells fresh and light with a hint of lemon” like the beer. 

According to the brewery:

“Pilsen Callao. By far the oldest beer in Peru, and one of the longest-lived in South America, Pilsen Callao dates back to its origins in 1863, when Federico Bindels partnered with French citizen Aloise Kieffer to make the first beer in the then port neighborhood of Callao. More than a century and a half later, it remains at the highest levels of preference in the Peruvian beer market.

Pilsen Callao has a way of seeing friendship, where equality is the purest and most natural form of friendship. An egalitarian friendship is one that values and respects people regardless of their differences, and that constitutes the way to grow as a more equitable society.”

Ivan Angulo — Ivan the Terrible Imperial Stout, Big Sky Brewing Co.

Let’s be honest. If I can find a beer with the same name as a player, I’m going to use it. Angulo is Brazilian and “the Terrible” was Russian, but both Ivans can strike fear into their opponents. Granted Mr. Terrible was 100% more bloodthirsty — though I doubt he was good with the ball at his feet. Angulo, on the other hand, is much nicer, better at soccer, and really filled a role with Orlando City, much in the way a 13.9% Imperial Stout fills your belly, and that’s not terrible at all.

According to the brewery:

“Ivan the Terrible Imperial Stout is rich, complex and intense. Sifting through the darkness you will find flavors of dark chocolate, dried fruit and bourbon. Drink now or lay down as this beer will assuredly evolve over time. Aged in American oak bourbon barrels.”

Mason Stajduhar — Keeper IPA, Castle Island Brewing Co.

Typically, I like to keep this to beers we can get in Florida, but I’ve made an exception this time. Castle Island Brewing Co. is located in Massachusetts. Mason Stajduhar is also from Massachusetts. He plays keeper for Orlando City. The beer is named Keeper IPA. The only way it could be better is if the brewery was the same age as Mason, which unfortunately it is not. I wonder if he has tried this beer, and more importantly, if he is willing to bring some back for us after the next time he visits Massachusetts. 

According to the brewery:

“Our flagship India Pale Ale is smooth but punchy; balanced yet intense. Despite the colossal amount of hops we cram into this beer, it’s still remarkably approachable-for pros and rookies alike-so grab a Keeper and save the day.”

As we head into another season, let me know if you were able to enjoy any of these selections. I also look forward to your own pairings in the comment section below.